Heal from Infidelity (or other betrayals) with
Emotionally Focused Therapy
Couples therapy for infidelity starts by creating safety
In our first session we'll meet all together where I'd like to hear from both of you how you're hurting. You’ll each have a chance to share your perspective, and we’ll focus on helping the injured partner express the emotional impact of the event—what it felt like, why it hurts, and how it affects their sense of safety in the relationship. If you are the injuring partner I will help you stay open and grounded while you listen.
We need to ensure our sessions feel safe for both of you, because without that foundation, our work won’t succeed
The next step is to meet with each of you individually. I want to know more about your background, how your former relationships have been, and what your goals and hopes are for your relationship.
Then we’ll explore what’s happening inside for each of you
This step is about getting to the heart of what’s really happening emotionally for both of you.
For the injured partner, we’ll explore the deep feelings behind the hurt and connect them to unmet needs (e.g., feeling safe, valued, or loved). For the partner who caused the injury, we’ll work on understanding their emotions—guilt, shame, or even fear—and help them see the injury from their partner’s perspective.
Next, the person who was injured will have the chance to truly be seen and heard in their hurt
The next step involves helping the partner who caused the injury respond with genuine empathy. This is where healing begins.
The injured partner will describe what the injury felt like - not just the surface injury - but how it felt to have their trust betrayed and their world upended.
The partner who caused the injury will practice taking a bit of their partner's pain and running it through their nervous system - so when they say they're sorry - they know exactly how it felt to be injured and the apology has depth.
The injured partner will have a sense of "You see me. You get it."
I'll guide the offending partner to offer an apology that works
Once the injuring partner can take in and hold a bit of their partner’s pain, the apology begins to feel real. It comes from the heart, not the head—and that’s what protects the relationship from further injury. When the injuring partner truly feels their partner’s pain, they develop a deeper acknowledgment of the hurt caused, the emotional impact, and a genuine commitment to change.
We’ll practice what this looks like in session so both partners can feel the sincerity and weight behind the apology.
Then we'll begin building your new, stronger relationship
In this stage, it’s about showing up differently—not just talking about change, but living it. The partner who caused harm begins rebuilding trust through consistent, reliable actions. No quick fixes, no grand gestures—just steady, genuine effort over time. For the partner who was hurt, we focus on what safety and reassurance look like for you—what helps your body start to believe things can be different.
We’ll also start to gently look at what was happening in your relationship before the affair—not to justify it, but to understand the disconnection that made space for it. That clarity helps you both rebuild something more honest, connected, and secure.
From there, the work shifts toward redefining your story. The affair isn’t the headline anymore—it’s a hard chapter you’ve moved through together. Healing doesn’t erase what happened, but it can change how it lives inside you. Together, you can write a story that sounds more like: We went through hell, and we found our way back to each other.
An attachment injury can feel overwhelming, but it’s not the end. It’s an opportunity to rebuild trust and strengthen your bond
in ways you may never have imagined.
The Process: Therapy for Infidelity in Revere, MA
Session one: couple together
We’ll meet together, all three of us. I’ll briefly explain how I work, then we’ll begin.
Infidelity shakes everything—but it doesn’t have to end everything. In our first session, we’ll slow down to understand what each of you knows, how the discovery happened, and what it’s cost you both.
Session two and three: individual sessions
In sessions two and three, I’ll meet with each of you separately. This time helps me understand your story—your background, hopes, and concerns—outside the couple dynamic. It also lets us build trust, so I can support both of you and the relationship itself.
Session four and beyond:couple together
From session four on, we’ll start uncovering the patterns that existed before the affair—and the ones keeping you stuck now. These sessions can be raw and emotional, and my role is to help you both feel safer in those hard moments.
We’ll focus on what happens when things go off track—when emotions rise, someone shuts down, or old pain resurfaces. I’ll guide you through conversations where the betrayed partner can share their hurt, and the partner who stepped outside can stay open and present.
Experience the transformative power of Emotionally Focused Therapy for Infidelity - Online in Revere, Massachusetts
When someone you love breaks your trust—through an affair, secrets, or betrayal—it shakes more than just your anger. It rattles the sense of safety you’ve built together, leaving you unsure who or what you can rely on.
In EFT, we call this an attachment injury. It disrupts the bond that holds a relationship steady. For the hurt partner, it can feel like freefall: the person you once turned to for comfort now feels like someone you need protection from.
EFT is designed to heal that rupture by repairing the emotional connection.
Here’s what that looks like:
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Slowing the storm. EFT helps make sense of the emotional chaos. It gives the hurt partner space to voice fears like, “I don’t know if I can trust you anymore.” That honesty isn’t the end—it’s the start of repair.
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Validating the impact. EFT doesn’t rush forgiveness or downplay the hurt. It meets the pain where it is.
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Guiding presence. The partner who caused the injury learns to stay emotionally present without getting lost in guilt or shame. They discover how to respond with curiosity, care, and consistent effort—not just regret.
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Rebuilding safety through connection. EFT helps both partners risk being emotionally real—sharing fear, longing, and sadness—rather than falling into attack-and-defend cycles.
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EFT doesn’t erase the past. But it gives couples a way to turn toward each other after betrayal, creating a path not back to what was, but toward something stronger: more honest, more alive, and deeply healing.
It’s Not Too Late
You made it here. That tells me something important: some part of you still believes.
That the connection—the laughter, the way you used to reach for each other—isn’t gone for good.
Right now, things might feel broken. Maybe you’re reeling, trying to find your footing in the middle of something you never thought would happen.
But this can be a beginning.
You don’t need to have the answers. You just need a little willingness to take the next step.
Together, we can start to understand what’s happened—and begin the slow, honest work of rebuilding something strong.
Frequently Asked Questions About Infidelity & Couples Counseling
(Serving Revere, Massachusetts, and online across all of MA)
What if the affair hasn’t ended yet?
If cheating or an affair is still happening, we can only do limited work together. Therapy may focus on clarity, communication, and decision-making, but true reconnection cannot happen while betrayal is ongoing. Asking the hurt partner to risk vulnerability isn’t safe if secrecy continues.
If one of you is leaning toward separation, Discernment Counseling can help you decide whether to repair the relationship or end it with greater understanding and compassion.
Can relationships recover after cheating or betrayal?
Yes. Many marriages and partnerships not only survive infidelity but also become stronger and more honest afterward. Recovery depends on openness, accountability, and a willingness to heal. With professional support, affair recovery counseling in Revere, MA, and online across Massachusetts can guide you through rebuilding trust and connection.
How does couples therapy help after an affair?
Affair recovery therapy gives structure during the chaos. Sessions provide a safe, neutral space where:
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The betrayed partner can work through anger, grief, and betrayal trauma.
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The unfaithful partner can acknowledge the harm, take responsibility, and learn how to rebuild trust.
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Both partners can understand the underlying disconnection that made the relationship vulnerable.
This work is not about blame—it’s about healing, insight, and repair.
What if we’re unsure about staying together?
You don’t need to know before starting therapy. Couples counseling can often begin with uncertainty. Therapy helps you slow down, explore options, and make decisions about your future from a grounded place rather than in crisis mode.
Is affair recovery therapy only about the cheating?
No. While infidelity brings couples into therapy, the work goes deeper than the betrayal itself. Together, we’ll explore:
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Relationship cycles and patterns of conflict
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Emotional distance or attachment injuries
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How the affair reflects unmet needs or avoided conversations
Infidelity therapy in Revere, MA is about more than the affair—it’s about creating clarity and emotional resolution, whether you choose to stay together or not.
How long does it take to heal from infidelity?
Healing after an affair takes months, not weeks. Recovery isn’t a straight line. With guidance, couples can:
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Move out of crisis mode
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Learn how to manage emotional triggers
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Rebuild trust step by step
There’s no exact timeline, but with affair recovery counseling the process becomes more focused and supported.
Do you help with emotional affairs, online infidelity, or pornography issues?
Yes. Emotional cheating, sexting, pornography-related betrayal, and online affairs can be just as damaging as a physical affair. What matters most is the impact on trust, safety, and intimacy in your relationship.
Do you work with repeat infidelity or serial cheating?
Yes. Couples therapy for repeat affairs requires exploring deeper issues, including:
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Trauma, avoidance, or compulsive behavior
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Patterns of self-sabotage
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Difficulties with intimacy and vulnerability
I feel broken after being cheated on. Can therapy help me?
Yes. You are not broken—you are hurt. Betrayal trauma can leave you feeling unsafe, unworthy, and lost. In therapy, you’ll have support to:
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Process overwhelming emotions
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Rebuild your inner stability and self-esteem
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Restore your confidence and sense of worth
Individual therapy for betrayal in Massachusetts is also available if you’re not ready for couples counseling.
Do you offer intensive therapy for affairs and betrayal?
Yes. I provide 3 hour intensive sessions for couples in crisis. Intensives are especially valuable for affair recovery because they allow you time to process the injury - each partner getting enough time to speak - without having to watch the clock. Please be aware, an intensive is a jump start - most couples with infidelity benefit from the support of ongoing weekly/biweekly therapy after their intensive.
Will you take sides in couples counseling?
No. Many people fear therapy will feel biased. As a trained Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist, I create balance and fairness. Both partners’ perspectives matter, and you’ll each have time to feel heard, validated, and understood.
Will I get to share my side of the story?
Yes. After our first joint session, I meet individually with both partners. These private meetings give you space to talk about your goals, personal history, and the impact of the affair. Then we come back together to move forward with greater understanding.
Best Places for Couples to Connect in Revere, MA
Revere, Massachusetts, offers a variety of charming spots for couples to connect and create lasting memories. Here are some top recommendations:
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Revere Beach: As America's first public beach, Revere Beach provides a scenic backdrop for romantic walks along its three-mile shoreline. It's easily accessible via the MBTA's Blue Line at the Wonderland and Revere Beach stops.
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Dryft Revere: This high-end beachfront dining destination offers panoramic views of the Atlantic Ocean. Located just miles from downtown Boston and accessible by public transportation, Dryft specializes in fresh seafood, house-made pastas, and craft cocktails.
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Mission Beach House: Situated at Spring Hill Suites on Revere Beach, Mission Beach House boasts stunning ocean views and a welcoming atmosphere. It's an ideal spot for sharing small plates, savoring hearty entrées, or unwinding with post-work drinks.
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Break Rock Brewing: For a laid-back date, visit Break Rock Brewing to enjoy craft beers in a relaxed setting.
Whether you're seeking relaxation, adventure, or romance, Revere offers the perfect places to deepen your connection.
