Kimberly Schildbach Therapy
Online Couples Therapy and Discernment Counseling in Washington, Massachusetts, Connecticut, & Florida.
Couples Therapy in Boston & Greater Boston
While my practice is online, I work with couples across Boston and surrounding communities including Brookline, Cambridge, Newton, Wellesley, Needham, Quincy, and other Massachusetts communities. Using attachment-focused therapy, I help couples rebuild trust after betrayal, soothe high-conflict patterns, and rebuild their emotional connection.
Couples Therapy - When You're Ready to Repair What’s Felt Broken
Online Couples Therapy for Couples in Crisis: Infidelity, Conflict, and Divorce in Boston, Massachusetts and all of MA, CT, WA, and FL.
Those small disconnects add up: conversations that go nowhere, tension that never really settles, a growing sense that you’re missing each other even when you’re in the same room. And sometimes, layered on top of that, you’re also trying to carry things most relationships weren’t meant to carry - broken trust, infidelity, addiction, the kind of hurt that changes how safe love feels.
One of you wants to work it out, while the other wants to talk about it later, when you’re both calmer. Neither of you is wrong. But when those attachment strategies collide, it can feel like you’re constantly triggering each other. One reaches harder, the other pulls back. One says, “Come close so we can fix this.” The other says, “I keep getting this wrong.” And somehow, even though you’re both hurting, you end up feeling more alone.
You are in the right place for couples therapy if you're in Boston or in the Boston area, and there is hope. Couples therapy works. And it would be my privilege to come alongside you both as we heal the root causes so you can be best friends again.
How Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) in Boston, MA Helps Couples Get to the Root of What Matters
Couples Therapy in Boston, Massachusetts
The Approach I Use in Couples Therapy
I help couples using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), one of the most researched and effective approaches in modern couples therapy. I'm going to help you get underneath the surface of your arguments you keep and reach for each other in a different way.
Most Arguments Are About Something Deeper
In reality, your fights are not what you think they are. An argument may start about money, parenting, sex, or who forgot to do something around the house, but those topics are rarely the real issue. Underneath those moments are much more vulnerable experiences. You might not code it, but I can help you contact the places you feel unseen, unimportant, rejected, or emotionally alone. When those deeper feelings are not distilled and honored, they often show up as anger, criticism, withdrawal, defensiveness, or complete shutdown.
Understanding the Cycle You Are Caught In
The most powerful shifts begin to happen when couples see the pattern they are caught in. Instead of seeing each other as the enemy, you start to recognize the cycle itself. You begin to notice the moments when fear takes over, when old wounds get touched, or when the longing for closeness comes out sideways as anger or distance. The problem stops being your partner and becomes the cycle the two of you are trapped in together. And together you can shift that pattern as a team.
Learning to Respond Differently to Each Other
It's time for you to learn how to reach for each other in ways that feel safer and more direct instead of falling back into criticism or withdrawal. Over time, these new interactions help rebuild the trust and stability in your relationship. Bring up a hot button topic begins to feel less volatile, each of you becomes less defensive, you're curious about each other again.
Couples therapy is about finally seeing the pattern that has been happening between you. When that pattern becomes clear, the endless arguments start to make more sense and the two of you can begin responding rather than reacting to each other. You'll learn to repair easier. You'll contact and share your deep longing to feel close and safe with each other again. My job is to help you clear out the space between you two. Let's get to work.
Real help for couples who are stuck, disconnected, or hurting - and want something to actually change.
I provide couples therapy in the Boston area for couples who are tired of managing symptoms and want to understand what’s actually happening between them - and how to change it.
This work is structured, emotionally focused, and grounded in decades of research. It is practical, relational, and designed to create real change, not just insight.
FAQs about Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling in Boston, Massachusetts
How do we know if couples therapy is right for us?
If you feel stuck in repeating conflicts, emotionally distant, or shaken by a loss of trust, couples therapy can help - even if things still feel manageable right now. I’ve seen again and again that when couples seek support early, before patterns become deeply entrenched, the work can be gentler and more effective. You don’t have to spend years unwinding disconnection that’s had time to harden. And if those patterns are already there, it’s not too late. Either way, couples therapy works. If you have a leak - you call a plumber. If you're fighting and struggling in your relationship - you find a couples therapist with a proven track record.
What makes Emotionally Focused Therapy different?
EFT works at the emotional level where lasting change happens. Instead of focusing only on skills or behavior, it helps couples understand the deeper patterns that drive disconnection, so the relationship itself begins to feel safer and more secure. It helps couples speak and listen from the heart, rather than from their defenses. It's amazing the bonding that I see happening in sessions.
Can couples therapy help after infidelity or betrayal?
Yes. Many couples come after a discovery, affair, or long period of secrecy. EFT offers a structured, trauma-informed way to process what happened and begin rebuilding safety and trust, whether your goal is repair or clarity about what comes next.
What if one of us isn’t sure about staying together?
Discernment Counseling is a structured, time-limited (usually 1-5 sessions) process to help couples decide is they would like to move to separation and divorce or take divorce off the table for 6 months and commit to a robust round of couples therapy.
How long does couples therapy take?
I can’t answer that. (Helpful, right?)
If there has been an affair, secrecy, or betrayal, couples therapy can take time. Trust doesn’t come back in a few sessions - it often takes many for safety to be rebuilt. If there have been years of disconnection, you will both need the support of weekly therapy and the repetition of bonding moments in session to begin feeling like a team again.
I don’t think of couples therapy as something you use only when a catastrophe happens, for a limited amount of time. I think of sessions as a laboratory - a place where you’re supported as you learn a new way of turning toward each other with openness and trust.
Your whole life will be better for it.
Do you work with high-conflict couples?
Yes. I specialize in working with couples who feel stuck in intense, painful patterns. These relationships often have deep bonds underneath the conflict. The work is about helping you access that connection again without getting trapped in the same cycles.
What if we’ve tried therapy before and it didn’t help?
I’m sorry this has been your experience. When couples therapy hasn’t helped in the past, it’s often not because therapy itself doesn’t work - it’s because the approach or the level of experience wasn’t the right fit for what you were facing.
Working with a therapist who has deep experience with couples in crisis matters. High-conflict dynamics, long-standing disconnection, and breaches of trust require more than good intentions and basic skills. They require a clinician who knows how to recognize entrenched patterns quickly, intervene effectively in the moment, and guide couples through emotionally charged conversations without letting sessions spiral or stall.
Can couples therapy help with sex addiction or sexually problematic behaviors?
Yes - couples therapy can be a powerful part of healing from sex addiction, compulsive sexual behaviors, or other problematic sexual patterns. While individual therapy focuses on personal insight and behavior change, couples therapy focuses on the relationship impact: broken trust, emotional pain, fear, and the desire to reconnect.
Is your couples therapy only for heterosexual couples?
Absolutely not. People of all genders and sexual orientations struggle with disconnection and communication difficulties in their relationships. I work with all couples - including queer, non-monogamous, and LGBTQIA+ partners - who are navigating challenges.
Whatever your identity or background, if you’re seeking help and healing, you are welcome here.
I’m afraid I’ll be blamed or shamed in couples therapy. Will I?
No. That’s not how I work.
You’re not here to be shamed. You’re here because something important in your relationship is hurting - and because you care enough to face it. My goal is to help you come closer to your inner world and share that with your partner. If shame arrives as we're exploring who you are - we can explore that too.
What if I’m scared this will make things worse?
It’s okay to be scared. I want to help you find that part inside that wants the cake and the frosting. Everyone deserves loving and supportive relationships, even if that isn't what they felt like in the past. If you've endured more than most, we'll prioritize you feeling safe in sessions - so you can explore what feels good for you in relationships and then we'll work together to help you communicate that to your partner.
You're Backed in Boston
Couples Therapy in Boston, Massachusetts and the Greater Boston Area
I provide specialized online couples therapy for couples throughout Boston and the Greater Boston area. Whether you’re navigating the discovery of an affair, trying to understand what happened, or deciding between divorce or whether your relationship can be repaired, I will help you begin doing the real work of recovery.
I work with couples throughout Boston, Back Bay, Beacon Hill, South End, Fenway, South Boston, Charlestown, Jamaica Plain, Brookline, Newton, Cambridge, Somerville, Arlington, Belmont, Watertown, Wellesley, Needham, and surrounding communities.
My practice is entirely online, making specialized couples therapy accessible whether you're in the heart of Boston or just outside the city. I work with couples throughout Greater Boston and across Massachusetts who are looking for more than just generic marriage counseling. Couples ready to put their hearts back in the game and build a relationship that feels (truly) like fireworks and rainbows.