You're here because you want your relationship to feel better. That’s where specialized couples therapy for sexually problematic behaviors can make a real difference.
When sexual compulsivity or sex addiction enters a relationship, it can shake the foundation of trust, intimacy, and connection. You may feel blindsided, betrayed, or unsure if your relationship can survive. Whether you're the partner struggling with compulsive behaviors or the one left reeling from the discovery, you don’t have to navigate this alone.
Healing Starts Here
I specialize in working with couples facing the challenges of sexually compulsive behaviors, helping them make sense of the pain and begin rebuilding trust. My approach is rooted in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), which allows us to address the deeper emotional wounds that fuel these behaviors and
the relational ruptures they create.
Addressing the Cycle of Disconnection
Sex addiction and compulsive behaviors damage relationships in a way that feels similar to an affair—because, instead of turning toward your partner, you found solace elsewhere. And maybe the partner who didn’t have this escape also began turning away or giving up. Now, you both feel like you’ve lost each other. Through Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy for sex addiction, I help couples turn back toward each other, slow down, and tune in to the feelings that arise before they fall into old coping patterns or shut down completely. Healing starts when you can reach for each other again.
What You Can Expect
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A Safe, Judgment-Free Space – This is not about blame. I want to help you grieve together for something that's been lost. Then we'll build it back up, stronger than before.
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Rebuilding Trust – We’ll work to repair trust with honesty, accountability, and structured support.
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Healing Together – I can help you learn to carry this struggle together. This is the true spirit of interdependence: supporting one another, sharing the burden, and growing stronger as a couple through this journey. You don't have to face this alone.
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Overcoming Isolation – Both of you might be feeling deeply alone—one struggling with shame and secrecy, the other with betrayal and grief. It’s hard to confide in friends and family, but you don’t have to go through this without support.
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A Path Forward – Whether that means working toward healing together or deciding the best path for each of you, I’ll help you find clarity.
Your partnership needs support right now. You don’t have to face this challenge alone—together, we’ll
navigate your path to healing.
TREATMENT APPROACH
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Help you become allies in facing the impact of sexually compulsive or problematic behaviors—shifting from secrecy, shame, and blame toward honesty and understanding
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I want to help you slow down your reactive patterns and identify the negative dance that keep both partners stuck—patterns fueled by mistrust, disconnection, and unmet emotional needs. Working together you will learn to shift these cycles can shift toward connection and repair
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Support the partner engaging in sexually problematic behavior to build the capacity to relationally cope—learning how to turn toward their partner with shame, stress, or fear instead of turning away or shutting down
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For the partner who has been hurt, make space for grief. Begin sending clear emotional signals that invite your partner to hold you in your pain, rather than manage it alone
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Gently examine old sexual scripts shaped by performance, pressure, or avoidance, and begin to co-create a sexual connection that feels emotionally safe for both of you
"Sex Addiction”? Compulsive Sexual Behaviors? Sexually Problematic Behaviors? What’s the Difference?
You may have noticed that the term “sex addiction” appears in quotation marks throughout my website—and that’s intentional. The American Psychiatric Association does not recognize sex addiction as a formal diagnosis in the DSM-5. But that doesn’t mean the distress, secrecy, or relationship damage tied to compulsive or problematic sexual behaviors isn’t real.
Sexuality is complex and deeply personal. What feels acceptable to one person—or one couple—may feel intolerable or wounding to another. That’s part of what makes this such a sensitive and painful topic for many relationships.
What I focus on in couples therapy:
I help couples navigate the emotional wreckage that often follows discoveries of secrecy, betrayal, or out-of-control sexual behavior. Whether the behavior involves pornography, hookups, online content, or something else—it’s the impact on trust, safety, and connection that takes center stage in our work.
My role is not to diagnose or pathologize, but to help both of you slow down, speak honestly, and begin to understand what happened and why. We explore how to make room for real repair—not through shame, but through structure, emotional clarity, and support.
Whatever you take from my fumbling, imperfect words, I hope you hear this clearly: you are welcome here.
Couples Therapy for Compulsive Porn Use
in Boston & all of MA, CT, VT, FL
When Is Porn Use a Problem?
Maybe “sex addiction” feels like too much. Too clinical. Too heavy. But if porn use (or hookups, sexting, chasing that next dopamine hit) is starting to create distance in your relationship, it’s worth paying attention to.
The problem isn’t just the behavior—it’s what it pushes out.
When life feels overwhelming, are you turning to screens or fantasy instead of turning toward your partner?
That pattern might feel like a quick escape, but over time, it builds walls. Your partner feels shut out. You feel ashamed or stuck. Nobody’s getting what they actually need.
In therapy, we slow things down (I know, I keep saying that—because it’s true) to look at the cycles of disconnection that keep couples missing each other.
So maybe that means you decide to stop using porn altogether. Or maybe it means you start really listening to what your partner is saying.
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer.
But what does matter is that you begin to face it together.
Not as enemies. Not as opponents.
As a team.
Working with respect and curiosity to understand the role this behavior has played—and what it’s costing you both.
Support for the Hurting Partner
If you’re the partner who has been hurt, you may feel blindsided, betrayed, and completely alone. Maybe your partner has started treatment—individual therapy, group work, or self-education—and while that’s an important step, it can also feel like you’ve been left to carry the emotional fallout on your own. Do you have a space to process your pain? Can you be honest with friends or family about what’s happening without feeling ashamed or afraid of being judged? Can the two of you talk about what you’ve been through without it spiraling into the same painful loop?
Grief shows up in waves—in anger, numbness, confusion, deep sorrow—and it deserves space, not just for the sake of healing individually, but so it can be shared in a way that brings you closer rather than driving you further apart. In Emotionally Focused Therapy, we slow everything down so your grief isn’t something you have to hide or “get over” quickly. Instead, it becomes something both partners can begin to hold together—with honesty, with care, and with growing trust.
How Individual Treatment Prepares You for Healing Together in Couples Therapy
In most cases, it’s incredibly helpful when the partner struggling with sex addiction or compulsive behaviors is already in individual treatment—or has recently completed it.
That’s because this space is focused on your relationship. Couples therapy isn’t a substitute for individual work, and my role here is to help you rebuild trust, repair your connection, and begin to heal together.
If you’re not sure whether this applies to your situation, I’m happy to talk it through with you.
Understanding the Impact
"Sex addiction" and sexually compulsive behaviors exist on a spectrum, but both can create distress and disruption in relationships. Sex addiction is characterized by an ongoing, compulsive need for sexual activity despite negative consequences, often tied to deep emotional pain or unprocessed trauma. Sexually compulsive behaviors, on the other hand, may not fit the strict definition of addiction but still involve urges or behaviors that feel out of control and difficult to stop. In both cases, partners may feel helpless, betrayed, or stuck in cycles of secrecy and shame. The goal of therapy is not to manage behaviors but to understand the emotional drivers behind them and to rebuild trust and connection as a couple.